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Two are Better
Photo: Jamie Harris
Growing up is hard enough without experiencing loss. Yet it happens: the death of a family member or friend, the separation or divorce of parents, the breakup of a dating relationship or the end of a close friendship. Losses are tough because you can feel so alone. No one knows exactly how you feel because they’re not you. Yet you teens can really be there for each other because you know what it’s like to be a teen.

For example, last week a Jr. High student at our school brought a letter for me to read. She’d written it to another student—her younger “Secret Sister” whose sibling had died. “Does this sound all right?” She asked me. Not only did it sound all right, it was beautiful because it came from the heart of one teen to another. It read:

Dear Little Sis,

I’m so, so, so, so, so sorry about your sister. I wish I could help you but I don’t have any idea what it’s like. I do know how it feels to hurt, though. My parents are divorcing and I know how much that hurts. I want you to know that I love you. If I had a magic wand I would wave it and make every thing better. But I can’t and I’m sorry. I totally admire your courage and I want you to know I’m praying for you. You’re awesome.


Your Big Sis

Sometimes it’s more comfortable to just ignore the fact that someone your age is hurting, so you wind up not saying anything at all. And they wonder if anyone cares. Maybe you feel inadequate, not knowing what to say. Maybe you’re afraid you’ll say the wrong thing and somehow make their pain worse. Maybe you’re embarrassed to be so personal with someone. When you don’t know what to say to a friend who’s experiencing a loss, you can always simply say, “I’m really sorry. I’m praying for you every day.” Or maybe you don’t have to say anything.

Here are some ways to show you care without saying a word:

• Send a card signed by you and a group of friends

• Give your cell phone number or e-mail address with the note: “If you ever need someone to talk to….”

• Make sure they’re not sitting alone at lunch or in church

• Give a huggable stuffed animal

• Share an encouraging worship CD

• Bake them a batch of homemade cookies

• Send a bouquet of flowers from a group of friends

• Encourage your parents to invite their family over for dinner on the weekend

These are simple ideas, but they will show that you took time to care. You never know… your acts of caring might be just what someone needs to feel they can make it. “Two are better than one…If one falls down, his friend can help him up” (Ecclesiastes 4:9,10).

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By Nancy Canwell. Copyright © 2014 by GraceNotes. All rights reserved. Use of this material is subject to usage guidelines. Scripture take from the NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION ®.

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